The Boondock Saints II: All Saints Day

Ten years ago, the story of upstart filmmaker Troy Duffy was supposed to be a rags to riches Hollywood tale like no other. He was a bartender who managed to sell his first script to Miramax Films for almost a million dollars, and became the toast of Hollywood overnight. His script for The Boondock Saints was the talk of the town for a little while, but a series of events led to no studio contract, no support, and a film release that only hit 5 screens for a week. All of this can be viewed in the highly entertaining documentary, Overnight, which chronicles the rise and fall of the cinematic career of Duffy. I highly recommend you watch it. I definitely recommend you watch it over his 10 years too late sequel, The Boondock Saints II: All Saints Day.

Yes, Duffy's film managed to become a major cult classic on DVD - so much so that a sequel is now in theaters. The original obviously has its fans, and so will this one. I, however, can only report on my personal reaction, and I can say with certainty that this is one of the most forced examples of cinematic machoism that I've seen in many a moon. Everything about this movie rings false. The dialogue rings false, because it uses four letter words in much the same way a 13-year-old would in order to sound tough. The overall tone rings false, because it feels a constant need to remind us how cool and bad it is, and it just comes across as being desperate. The visual style and tone of the action sequences seems to be stuck in the late 90s, back when people were trying to emulate Tarantino. It feels very dated, out of touch, and very unsure of itself, despite the cocky male attitudes that are constantly on display in each and every one of its characters.

The movie reunites us with the MacManus Brothers, a pair of hard-drinking, tough talking Irish blokes who went on a vigilante killing spree 10 years ago in Boston, which climaxed with the public execution of a notorious gangster. Since that day, they have gone into hiding, and now live with their father (Billy Connolly) in Ireland, tending sheep. Connor (Sean Patrick Flanery) and Murphy (Norman Reedus) McManus now have fake long hair and beards that make them both look like they're both starring in the title role of a dinner theater production of Jesus Christ: Superstar. But then, troubling news comes their way. Back in Boston, a priest has been murdered, and the killer has tried to use their signature murder style, so that the police will think that the MacManus Brothers were responsible. A quick shave, haircut, and a gratuitous shower scene later, and the boys are ready for action once again to track down the killer. Their father does not seem the least bit surprised by his sons' actions. He explains their need for revenge by saying, "Peace is the enemy of memory". I'll leave you to figure that one out.

So, the MacManus Brothers return to Boston, and team up with a trio of foul-mouthed simple minded cops from the first film. There's some new friends to aid them, as well. On the ship back to America, they befriend a Mexican named Romeo (Clifton Collins, Jr.), who acts as their sidekick, comic relief, and an excuse for them to make a lot of dated racist and ethnic jokes about Mexicans. There's also an FBI Special Agent named Eunice Bloom (Julie Benz), whose decision to wear dominatrix-style high heels at crime scenes does not seem the least bit practical. (When she makes her entrance at the scene of the priest's murder, she slowly steps out of a car like a supermodel in an 80s music video, complete with blaring guitar rifts blasting on the soundtrack.) From this point on, the plot doesn't really matter. Connor and Murphy spend as little time as possible gathering information on who framed them, and spend most of the time trading drunken insults with one another, and occasionally getting in elaborate and overly-staged shoot outs, that are often done in slow motion, and sometimes given instant replays, just in case we missed a single detail the first time around.

At least The Boondock Saints II is a competently made bad movie. It's shot well enough, and there are some good actors on display, including Peter Fonda and Willem Dafoe in small roles. But the story is leaden, and the dialogue is often insulting in its misguided views of manhood and violence. It's hard to tell if Duffy is trying to be ironic, or if he actually believes the stuff he has his characters preach. He even stops the movie completely to give us a lengthy dream sequence where the MacManus Brothers are visited by a fallen friend, who inspires them with talk of "real men don't talk about their feelings", and "John Wayne was such a man, he died with 45 pounds of undigested red meat in his ass". As if the movie's forced male machoism vibe wasn't enough for us to pick up on the point, he has to stop the film to spell it out for us. The guys in this movie murder with glee, frequently make jokes about prison rape and homosexuality, and guzzle hard liquor as if it were water. The only time the MacManus Brothers are really offended is if their manhood is brought into question.

I got tired of all this forced male posturing long before the movie did. Did I mention this movie is almost two hours long? Well, it is, and it runs out of steam before the first hour is up. This is a tiresome and very tired movie that becomes even more so the more it stresses how cool and manly it is. I imagine Duffy hopes his audience will go out and buy a six pack of beer and eat an extra bloody steak when they're done watching this movie. All I wanted to do was wipe this movie from my memory as soon as possible. Think I'll start as soon as I'm done typing this sentence.

See the movie times in your area or buy the DVD at Amazon.com!

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