My Soul to Take

How can you tell when a filmmaker has completely lost his way? Well, when he makes a movie like My Soul to Take is usually a pretty good sign. For his first shot behind the camera since 2005, Wes Craven has brought us an incoherent mess made up of half-baked ideas, stupid symbolism, and a string of uninspired death scenes. Even in a year that has not exactly been a high point for the horror genre, this is the goofiest thriller I've seen since The Box.

The opening scenes set up the back story of the Riverton Ripper, a serial killer who prayed upon a sleepy little town, until it was discovered that the Ripper was a family man suffering from multiple personalities, one of which was very psychotic. One fateful night, he murders his pregnant wife in her sleep, and tires to kill his three-year-old daughter, but the police bust in and stop him. We get a string of "is he or is he not dead" moments, where the killer keeps on coming back to life when you think he's finally dead. He even comes back to life as the ambulance is taking him to the hospital, and causes an accident. The body of the Ripper was never found at the scene of the accident, and ever since then, he's become an urban legend. The same night this happened, seven babies were born, one of whom was saved and taken out of the womb of the Ripper's wife.

Sixteen years later, the seven kids born that night hold a ceremony that's supposed to keep the spirit of the Ripper at bay on their birthday, the anniversary of the tragic night. On this night, it falls on the shoulders of a kid named Bug (Max Thieriot) to perform the ceremony, but he gets frightened, and doesn't go through with it. Sure enough, that same night, the Riverton Ripper returns, and begins killing the seven children tied to his legend. The Ripper himself sort of resembles the lovechild of Rob Zombie and John Travolta's character from Battlefield Earth. Oh, and he talks in a raspy voice that sort of resembles the evil Dr. Claw from the Inspector Gadget cartoons. As Bug and the other kids try to find out what's happening, a lot of questions are raised. Is the Ripper truly alive, or back from the dead? Could it be that one of his many personalities were transferred into the seven children who were born that night, and one of them is carrying on with his work?

Unfortunately, the questions the audience ask, such as "what is the point", or "why should we care" are never answered. This is a lethargic little supernatural tale that takes its sweet time getting to where it's going, and never really does anything when it gets there. My Soul to Take plays like the tired swan song of a man who's lost touch with his work. The scares are pedestrian and lifted almost directly from other films (some his own), the characters are written as if they did not have the slightest bit of thought put to them (many exist solely to be killed), and the whole movie ends up sinking under a shaky narrative and incoherent plotting. Plot twists begin to feel like afterthoughts, as Craven does little to flesh them out. Potentially interesting ideas, like Bug being able to see visions of his dead friends in mirrors who communicate with him and try to help him, are pretty much tossed in haphazardly, with little to no thought toward consistency.

The movie's bad enough, but just to make anyone foolish enough to pay to see this even angrier, the film is being presented in 3D, even though there are absolutely no 3D shots whatsoever in the film itself. I'm serious. Not a single one. I took my glasses off for long periods of time, and could not tell the difference, aside from the fact the glasses made everything look dark and muddy. This is the kind of film that argues why we even have 3D in the first place, if greedy studio heads are just going to use it simply as a means to bilk more money. In an interview, Wes Craven pretty much stated he is not very fond of the current 3D trend, meaning the decision was most likely forced upon him. Sure, Craven deserves some blame (he went along with it and, well, he made the movie to start with), but whoever did this "3D conversion" should be ashamed of themselves.

Even if My Soul to Take had the most impressive 3D visuals known to man, it wouldn't hide the fact that there's not a single character worth caring about, or plot thread that we can follow from beginning to end. The movie plays like it's been edited numerous times in a vain effort to squeeze some entertainment value from the jumbled scenes. And yet, all this editing has made the characters either completely underdeveloped, or go through severe and unexplained shifts in personality. The worst example is a girl at school named Fang (Emily Meade), who goes through so many shifts, I had no idea what I was supposed to think of her. She starts out as a sort of school crime boss, who runs a money extortion scheme out of the girl's bathroom. Then, it's revealed that she's Bug's brother. (Information we did not know earlier.) Then she lashes out at him violently as she explains his terrifying past. Then she helps him fight back when the killer has them cornered. The movie can't seem to get a handle on her.

As often happens when I'm stuck watching a movie I have little to no interest in, my mind starts to wander, and sometimes I come up with my own movie. I dreamed up a story about the "Riverdale Ripper", who terrorizes the kids from the Archie comics. Yes, a slasher film concerning Archie and Jughead proved to be favorable to what I was watching. Should you see this movie, you'll probably be desperate for mental escapism as well. Not that I recommend you do see it.

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