Judy Moody and the Not Bummer Summer

Last summer, we had Ramona and Beezus, a kids movie targeting young girls based on the series of books by Beverly Cleary. It was kind of sweet and charming. In my review of the film, I used words like "smart", "funny", and "imaginative" to describe it. These words will not be seen or necessary in my review of Judy Moody and the Not Bummer Summer, a kids movie targeting young girls based on the series of books by Megan McDonald. Maybe very little girls in the single digit age group will find something to like here. Anyone hovering around the double digits will find young Judy Moody and her friends repellant.

Our title heroine is an insufferable and obnoxious third grader played by Jordana Beatty. She has wild red hair, screams I'd say 75% of her dialogue, runs and bounces around like Pee Wee Herman on a sugar rush, and describes things as "thrilladelic" and "holy macaroni". Director John Schultz (Aliens in the Attic) has ordered all of his child and adult stars to act as outrageous as possible, but frequently mistakes "outrageous" for "obnoxious" to the point that we just want to scrape these characters right off the screen. Judy is preparing to have the best summer vacation ever, and has even drawn up a complex chart of dares that her friends and her can perform over the summer. Each time they pull off one of those dares (which include stuff like riding a roller coaster or walking a tightrope), they get "thrill points". Those who have the most points at the end of the summer wins. What Judy did not count on is that two of her best friends are leaving for the summer - One's off for circus camp, the other to Indonesia with her mom.

Alone and mostly friendless for the summer, Judy is about to face the reality that her younger brother, Stink (Parris Mosteller), is going to have a better summer than she is. Stink's apparently going to spend his summer with his friends searching for Bigfoot, who's been sighted around the neighborhood. To her rescue comes Judy's eccentric and reckless driving Aunt Opal (Heather Graham), who's come to look after Judy and Stink when their parents are suddenly called off to California to look after the grandparents. Opal's the free spirited sort who likes to make hats out of garbage can lids and abstract art. Watching Graham as Aunt Opal, I found myself remembering that 14 years ago, she was playing Rollergirl in Boogie Nights. Now she's stuck in movies like this. She should have quit while she was ahead.

The movie itself never really amounts to much, other than a series of random gross out gags. Judy starts a secret club where the initiation involves having a toad urinate on your hand. (Don't ask.) She rides a roller coaster, and gets vomited on by her friend. (Please, don't ask.) She goes on a picnic with Aunt Opal and little Stink to an abandoned amusement park, and winds up eating "poop sandwiches". (Seriously, don't ask.) While all this is going on, Judy receives postcards and e-mails from her friends, and how they're swimming with sharks, and learning how to saw people in half. We, on the other hand, get to see Judy glue her hand to a table. Note to screenwriters: Don't make it sound like your off camera characters are having more fun than the main character you're forcing us to watch.

Judy Moody is frantic, colorful, and mostly harmless, but boy, is it ever irritating. The movie tries every trick in the book to grab our attention - CG cartoons, words and captions appearing next to the characters, they even throw in Jaleel White (best known as the guy who used to be Steve Urkel on Family Matters) as Judy's favorite teacher, Mr. Todd. But the whole thing ends up being dull and aimless. I didn't like Judy, I didn't like her friends, and I didn't like the world she inhabits. This is the kind of film that thinks as long as it throws enough screaming kids, fake vomit, and poop up on the screen, it will eventually amount to something. Maybe it will be enough for some kids (very, very little kids, I hope), but I'm thinking they'll be able to see through this for the cynical junk it really is.

The movie doesn't even end on an interesting note. For a movie that managed to gather up Rollergirl, Bigfoot, and Steve Urkel in the same story, I was at least expecting a big finish. As Judy Moody herself might say, "Holy macaroni, is this a bad movie".

See the movie times in your area or buy the DVD at Amazon.com!

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