The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones

Poor Clary Fray (Lily Collins) is having a really bad day.  While she's out at a dance club with her best friend, the geeky movie-referencing Simon (Robert Sheehan), she happens to witness a murder.  Weird thing is, she's the only one who seems to have seen it, as when she tries to point out what's going on to her friend, he sees nothing.  To make it even more creepy, one of those guys she saw at the nightclub starts following her around.  Good thing he's a hunky blonde dreamboat with smoldering looks and a British accent, or Clary might actually be in trouble.  As we all know, in movies targeted at teen girls, mysterious handsome boys with dreamy accents are never dangerous.

The stranger is named Jace Wayland (Jamie Campbell Bower), who is surprised that Clary can see him, as he is a "shadow hunter", and cannot usually be seen by normal people ("mundanes", as they're called in this movie).  It turns out that shadow hunters spend their days killing demons that can disguise themselves as humans, dogs, or whatever they please.  So, why is he visible to Clary, then?  Before those answers come, Clary gets a frantic phone call from her mother as their apartment is being ransacked by home invaders who are looking for a magical goblet that her mother has supposedly hidden from evil forces.  Turns out her mom's in on this whole shadow hunter business, and hasn't been very open with Clary.  Mother tells her daughter not to come home, but Clary does anyway, and finds her mom gone.  Good thing the crazy woman who lives in the apartment downstairs (CCH Pounder) is actually a witch who knows a thing or two about these shadow hunters, and can send Clary and Jace on a quest where they can find some answers.

Yes, it turns out that not only do demons walk amongst us, but so do witches, warlocks, vampires, werewolves, and just about any other mystical monster you could think of.  Clary is introduced to this secret world when Jace takes her to "the institute", where the shadow hunters live.  They dress in a lot of black leather, and draw runes on their skin that allows them to use magic powers against the forces of darkness.  Speaking of the forces of darkness, they're working for a rogue shadow hunter named Valentine (Jonathan Rhys Meyers), who wants that mystical goblet that Clary's mom was apparently protecting.  Why he wants it, we don't completely know yet, unless we have read the series of books by Cassandra Clare.  In fact, as the events unfold, we don't know a lot of things.  It's pretty much a prerequisite that you must be up on the books in order to enjoy this movie, or sometimes even understand what the heck is supposed to be happening.  The true success of any adaptation is that it should not only please those familiar with the original source, but also build interest in those unfamiliar.  This is ultimately why The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones largely fails.

City of Bones is the latest "young adult" book phenomenon to be adapted into a movie, hoping to ride the tails of the Twilight and Hunger Games franchises to massive success.  The studio is so confident in this movie's success, they've already greenlit the second film, set to be released next year.  In adapting the original book in the series, first-time screenwriter Jessica Postigo crams the dialogue with as much exposition as she possibly can.  Oddly enough, the more the movie tried to explain itself, the more confused I became.  Even with a running time that stretches past two hours, this thing feels needlessly complicated.  There are so many characters, so many different races of monsters, and so much information to take in that it just gets overloaded.  It doesn't help that the pace of this film is lethargically slow.  Apparently these people are in no rush to save the world or find out what happened to Clary's mom, as they have plenty of time to stand around, talking in drawn-out conversations that seem needlessly wordy at times.

It's obvious that the movie wants to be a story of female empowerment, as the frightened teenager Clary realizes her destiny, and begins to take her stand against evil amongst the shadow hunters.  Yet, even this is clumsily handled here, as we never get a sense of her transformation.  Part of this is due to the underwhelming performance of Lily Collins in the role (who is attractive to look at, but less convincing in her portrayal), but I think a big part of the blame should be laid at the feet of the screenplay, which doesn't even give Clary an opportunity to react to this strange new world of hidden monsters that she's discovered.  I mean, you would think that discovering the secret society of shadow hunters would at least elicit a "wow" out of anyone, but not Clary, who acts as a tool of the plot, simply moving from one point to the next.  Even the love triangle that develops between her, the sexy and mysterious Jace, and her best friend Simon feels limp here, and certainly offers no dramatic tension. (Gee, do you think she'll end up with the handsome and rugged British guy, or the dorky guy with glasses who likes to quote movies like Close Encounters and Ghostbusters?)

And if you're going to build your movie around a secret fantasy world that exists within our own, why make it so darn dark and ugly looking?  A good majority of this movie is shot in abandoned hotels, murky hallways, and dark corridors.  There is one moment in the film that I think is supposed to be beautiful and magical (a romantic moment between Clary and Jace in a magical flower garden), but even that is underwhelming, and mostly serves to highlight a forgettable pop song on the soundtrack album.  Not even the characters generate much interest, save for one moment where it is hinted that one of the shadow hunters may in fact be gay.  This grabbed my attention, as it would be the first time a movie based on a young adult novel would actually acknowledge a homosexual relationship.  However, it was not to be, as it's immediately dropped as soon as its brought up.  And here I was hoping the genre was going to grow up a little.

The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones is uninspired in just about every way imaginable - performances, characterization, and plotting.  There's opportunity for fun, or at least intrigue, but the movie misses every opportunity.  Even with some small bits of humor scattered throughout, this is a largely joyless and drab film to sit through.  This movie is only for those who are completely enamored with the books, and even they probably deserve better than this.

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