Masterminds

If there's one kind of comedy I can't stand, it's the kind that thinks it can get laughs simply out of its characters being stupid.  It seldom works, though there are of course rare exceptions, such as 1994's Dumb and Dumber, and the classic Three Stooges shorts.  Most of the time, however, these kind of movies that rely solely on how stupid the people in it are simply end up exhausting me.  And Masterminds is one of the most exhausting movies I've seen in a long time.

It's been a long time since I've seen a movie have so much contempt for the people who inhabit it.  The people in Masterminds are poor, uneducated trailer trash, and that seems to be all the screenplay has to say about them.  It also expects us to laugh at that fact constantly.  The obvious question is why?  Why are we supposed to laugh at the ignorance of these people?  Is it supposed to make us feel better about ourselves?  Are we supposed to be happy that we're smarter than the people up on the screen?  Of course, just about every audience member is smarter than a character in a movie.  So why go to such great lengths to make these people so dumb and unlikable?  And why waste the talents of actors like Zack Galifianakis, Kristen Wiig, Owen Wilson, Kate McKinnon, Leslie Jones, and Jason Sudeikis?  They obviously can't breathe life into this dead-on-arrival material.  All they can do is sink in the muck as they're forced to do scenes where someone poops in a hotel swimming pool for no reason, or a deplorable scene where Wiig and McKinnon get in a fight in a department store that ends with one of them having vaginal itch cream squirted in their mouth.

The film is loosely based on the true story of one of the biggest armored truck heists in history.  As the film opens, we're introduced to David Ghantt (Galifianakis), a bored armored truck driver who lives with his trailer trash fiance (McKinnon) and her ever-scowling mother, who constantly insults him.  David is the kind of guy who's smart enough to hold down a steady job, but not smart enough not to accidentally shoot himself when he puts his gun down the back of his pants.  The only bright spot in his life is his partner at work, Kelly (Wiig), whom he has a crush on., but she doesn't last on the job very long.  After she quits, her lowlife friend Steve (Wilson) convinces her that they should rob the armored truck company, and use David as an inside man/scapegoat should the heist go wrong.  Kelly successfully seduces David into doing the job, and once it is done, David heads for Mexico where he will wait for Kelly to join him, and they can live in luxury.  Of course, this is all a ruse, as Kelly has no intention of joining him.  In fact, Steve is sending a hitman named Mike (Sudeikis) to kill David.

There is not a single likable person inhabiting this movie.  Everyone in it is woefully stupid, greedy, violent, selfish and conceited.  David, who is supposed to be the guy we're rooting for, has no problem cheating on and leaving his fiance at a moment's notice.  Kelly is willingly using David's affections for her to her advantage, and sets him up to take a fall.  Steve is a master manipulator, who only cares about himself, and eventually hires someone to kill David.  Could a comedy be made about these people?  Of course!  With the right approach, just about anything can be funny.  But Masterminds is not funny in any way.  It simply parades these moronic and hateful people before us, and expects us to laugh at how dumb they're being.  Sometimes, the movie gets desperate, and it puts David in a really stupid looking disguise when he's on the run from police.  You know a comedy has hit rock bottom when it's resorting to funny hats and fake mustaches to get laughs.

This movie simply baffled me.  It doesn't attempt any real laughs, unless you think farts are the height of comedy.  Again, I honestly think we're supposed to be laughing at how stupid and selfish these people are.  It just doesn't make any sense.  Why gather up such a cast of talent, and not allow them to be funny?  Why have everybody play below their abilities?  This is a nasty, mean-spirited piece of work.  The movie looks down on the characters, who are portrayed largely as white trash cartoons.  You can build a successful movie around unlikable people, but they also have to be compelling characters who grab our attention.  Nobody here is the slightest bit interesting.  They're just greedy dimwits who make a lot of mistakes, because they're just so gosh-darn stupid.

Masterminds has been sitting on the shelf for well over a year, due to the fact that its studio filed for bankruptcy last year.  They sorted things out, and after many delays, have finally released it in theaters.  If the studio heads had any mercy, they would have kept this one locked away.  This is the kind of movie where you feel sorry for everyone involved.

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