The Benchwarmers

Given the fact that I have absolutely despised the past couple films that have rolled out of Adam Sandler's Happy Madison production company, I did not have high hopes walking into The Benchwarmers. How could anyone have even the slightest of expectations after sitting through Sandler's own pointless remake of The Longest Yard, as well as Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo and this past January's Grandma's Boy? The Benchwarmers may not make me forgive everyone involved for these cinematic atrocities, but truth be told, it's not all that bad. There were even some times, I am forced to admit, where I actually laughed. Maybe this movie caught me in the right mood, because while I can't quite give it a full recommendation, I liked it a lot more than I expected to and more than I probably should have.

The film tells the simple story of three life-long friends who have been picked on all their lives by jocks and other more popular and socially coordinated people. They include all-around nice guy Gus (Rob Schneider), smart-mouthed video store clerk Richie (David Spade), and mentally challenged paperboy Clark (Jon Heder). It's a bit strange that the movie tries to pass them off as friends from school, seeing as though Schnedier and Spade are almost 15 years older than Heder in real life, but I digress. When the three spy a young kid being bullied by the local little league team, they decide to stick up for the kid, and challenge the tormentors to a game. Due to the fact that Gus actually has some form of talent for the game, he leads the three to victory, and score a win for underdogs everywhere.

The father of the boy being picked on (John Lovitz) happens to notice this, and also happens to be a former tormented geek himself who has since become a millionaire, and now decorates his mansion with various props from sci-fi films and even drives around in the original car from the Knight Rider TV series, despite the fact that the computerized car constantly criticizes his driving ability. He proposes that the three friends start their own team, and travel the nation, going up against various bullish Little League teams, and standing up for the uncoordinated and unpopular kids everywhere. The team becomes celebrities with picked-on kids everywhere who follow their exploits on internet webcams. However, Gus' past will eventually catch up with him, as he has a childhood secret that may destroy their dream of finally winning respect.

Director Dennis Dugan (who is no stranger to Sandler comedy, having also helmed Happy Gilmore and Big Daddy) has taken obvious inspiration from the Revenge of the Nerds franchise in his story of the put-upons standing up against the jocks who have bullied them most of their life. Heck, the former school tormentors of the three main characters (who now head the bullish little league team) are not far removed from the villainous Alpha-Betas in the Nerds films. Yet, this movie has a certain sweetness and charm that took me by surprise. Yes, it has the usual crude humor that you would expect in a Sandler production (kids farting in each other's faces, and one or two scenes of projectile vomiting), but one can't deny that it's got its heart in its right place and it does not exist solely to be crude, as the toilet humor is kept to a minimum. The film's message of anti-bullying and kids needing to respect one another is a good one, even if the tone of the movie turns sappy and preachy in its third act, stopping just short of hitting us over the head with its words of tolerance.

But the real question for anyone wanting to see this movie is how funny is it? While the jokes miss more often than hit, there were a couple moments that actually got me laughing. Most of them are supplied by John Lovitz, in what is probably one of his funniest screen performances in a while. His line delivery is usually funny enough, but just seeing him pull up into a scene in both the car from Knight Rider AND the original Batmobile later on was enough to get a chuckle from me. There's also a rather odd character played by the film's co-writer, Nick Swardson that surprisingly grew on me. He plays an outcast who is terribly afraid of the outdoors, and keeps himself locked up in his "safe room" (a closet) at all times. His various attempts to venture out into the outside world got a couple laughs out of me. But perhaps the greatest miracle that this movie pulls off is that it actually manages to make Rob Schneider come across as normal and likeable. There's a sentence I certainly never thought I'd find myself writing in my lifetime, and I actually had to stop and stare at it after finishing it. Schneider mainly plays the straight man in this movie, and he's actually quite good at it. Spade plays his usual sarcastic persona, and Heder gives us yet another variation of his Napoleon Dynamite character. Neither really impressed me, but they have the rare moment that made me smile.

Look, I'm not really saying you should rush out and see The Benchwarmers. If you are interested in it, it can wait for video. But I really was surprised. It may have not been able to win me over completely (the moments that do work are surrounded by long periods where very little works), but given my expectations walking in, I was anticipating much worse. Clocking in at just under 90 minutes, the movie is fast-paced, breezy, and never offends. And yes, I'm just as shocked as you are. If a movie can make me tolerate a Rob Schneider performance, who knows what else is possible. Maybe this will lead to even more amazing things, like finally convincing myself that Crash deserved the Best Picture award. Okay, that's probably just wishful thinking on my part.

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