Abduction

John Singleton's Abduction is not the goofiest action movie I've seen this year (that honor still belongs to I Am Number Four), but it certainly makes a good effort for the title. Let's take the title for starters, which is completely mind-boggling, as no abduction of any kind takes place during the course of the film. Yes, there is a point where its young hero Nathan Harper (played by Taylor Lautner, the shirtless-wonder from the Twilight movies) thinks he was kidnapped as a small child, when he sees his photo on a missing persons site. But, the whole site turns out to be a ruse set up by the film's villain. No abduction ever took place, making the title all the more bewildering.

And what about that missing person site, which turns out to be a major part in the villain's plot? For years, the villain has been hunting Nathan down, for reasons that remain unclear for most of the movie, and when the reasons are revealed, you kind of wish they were unclear all over again. So, he posts a photo of Nathan as a small child on a website, and posts a phone number to contact. When Nathan discovers the website and the photo while doing research for a school project, he contacts the number, which tips the villain off to where Nathan is located. So, let's think this through - The villain somehow knew that Nathan would one day have to do a school project that would lead him to the fake missing person's website he set up years ago as a way to track Nathan down. Surely there must be easier and less convoluted ways to track someone down. I'd hate to see how this guy goes about having someone murdered, if he goes through all this trouble just to find somebody.

But, I digress - Abduction is intended to be a starring vehicle for Lautner that shows off his skills as a leading man action hero. It fails on all counts. There is very little action to speak of, other than a scuffle with a bad guy on a train. The rest of the time, Nathan spends his time running along side his somewhat-girlfriend Karen (Lily Collins) from evil terrorists, C.I.A. agents who can't be trusted, and other shady individuals. Heck, for a movie that is supposed to be grooming Lautner as the next big action star, you'd think the movie would give him the chance to battle the lead villain in a big standoff scene. But nope, he just runs away, and is saved by sheer dumb luck. Say what you will about Schwarzenegger as an actor, but at least he always took care of business in his movies. Lautner shows not the slightest bit of charisma or personality, as he spends most of the film's running time staring blankly at whatever might be happening (his parents being murdered, his house blowing up, his girlfriend being put in danger). I suppose this was a choice on the part of the filmmakers, trying to make him look deep and edgy. Instead, it makes him look lost, as if he's not sure what he's supposed to be doing whenever on camera.

So, the plot - Nathan stars the movie as an ordinary suburban teenager who likes partying and getting drunk, while his parents (played by Jason Isaacs and Maria Bello, both of whom should have known better) enjoy kicking the crap out of him, and disguising it as a martial arts workout, when he comes home with a hangover. Nathan stumbles upon the missing persons website while researching a school project, and a short while later, some mysterious men show up at his doorstep to kill his parents. Nathan and his girlfriend from across the street are forced to run when they discover that the villains somehow managed to stick a time bomb in the oven during the time they were having a kung fu fight with Nathan's parents. The house blows up (which oddly does not bring any gawkers or neighbors out of their homes), and Nathan and Karen are now on the run.

At the hospital, they come across Nathan's therapist, Dr. Bennett (Sigourney Weaver), who tells Nathan not to trust anyone, especially not a C.I.A. agent named Burton (Alfred Molina). The whole thing has to do with some foreign assassins led by a man named Kozlow (Michael Nyquist). He was the man responsible for the fake missing persons website, as well as the one responsible for the death of Nathan's parents, as well as his real mother when he was a young child. It turns out that the parents Nathan was living with were special agents who had adopted him after the death of his real mother. Dr. Bennett is an agent too, and all of them have been looking after Nathan, in case Kozlow would ever find him. Why is Kozlow trying to track him down? I'll leave you to discover that for yourself if you're unwise enough to see this movie. If you do, expect to be asking a lot of questions, as very little in this movie makes any real sense.

Director John Singleton burst onto the scene in the early 90s with his acclaimed film, Boyz 'n the Hood. Since then, he's usually been slumming it in action junk like this, so it's not really a big surprise to see his name attached to Abduction. He shows no sense of timing, pace, or energy here, however. For an action movie, everything's set at such a casual pace. There's too much set up, and we don't get our first real action sequence involving Lautner until about the 75 minute mark. Watching the movie, I felt like everything was just completely off - The performances, the editing, and especially the pacing. A good action movie makes you feel like you're being taken along on a thrill ride. This movie only makes you feel like checking your watch every 15 or 20 minutes, to see how close it is to the film being over.

I won't go so far as to say that Lautner has no future in action films, as I don't think this is the best movie to judge. However, if he really does think a movie like this will win him new fans, he's completely delusional. I won't go so far as to say this is the worst movie of the year, as there's much worse out there. But it has to be one of the dumbest.

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