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Wednesday, March 15, 2023

65


When did movies become so cynical about dinosaurs?  Here are wondrous beasts that existed millions of years before us, and should bring about a sense of awe and wonder.  And yet, in the recent Jurassic World sequels and now 65, they are treated solely as either a jump scare tactic, or like targets in a video game.  In a way, the whole film resembles a video game, as it's simply nothing more than a gun-toting hero trying to get from Point A to B, while fending off massive beasts that jump out at him over and over.

Here is yet another movie that proves my belief that Hollywood takes scripts that some 60 years ago would feature no-name actors on obvious sets being chased by rubber monsters, and spruce them up with bigger talent and the finest special effects money can by.  Strip away all the modern flash, and this thing would be right at home on late night television in the 1980s, or be ridiculed on Mystery Science Theater 3000.  The movie wants to be a survival epic, and writers and directors Scott Beck and Bryan Woods have experience in that field, as they worked on the screenplay for John Krasinski's A Quiet Place and its sequel.  However, while those films had a certain element of humanity and genuine tension to them, 65 is nothing more than a spruced-up B-Movie from another time.

The movie rushes through its set up, which makes it hard to care about its lead character, a space pilot by the name of Mills (Adam Driver), who hails from the distant planet of Somaris, along with his loving wife (Nika King) and young daughter (Chloe Coleman).  The little girl desperately needs an operation to save her life from an unnamed disease.  It's because of this operation that Mills takes a job that will send him away from his home planet for two years for a space expedition.  However mid-voyage, the ship is struck by an asteroid, and a majority of the ship and its passengers are lost when it crashes on Earth some 65 million years ago.  

I want to pause here, and bring up how this scene plays out.  We first see Mills sleeping in his quarters on the ship, when he is stirred awake from the noise outside.  Yes, he actually hears the asteroid striking the ship in the vast vacuum of outer space.  Students of the Alien movies will tell you that in space, no one can hear you scream, but apparently you can hear an asteroid shower.  I'm aware that Sci-Fi movies don't have to play by our laws of nature, but that immediately gave me the vibes that I was essentially watching a B-Movie with a big budget.  After the crash, Mills finds himself stranded on a prehistoric Earth inhabited by a variety of dinosaurs who exist to either lurk in dark shadows and leap out, or to jump directly in the path of Mills' blaster gun when convenient.

The only other survivor of the crash is a young girl named Koa (Ariana Greenblat), but there's a language barrier between them.  Apparently Mills' part of the planet Somaris speak English, while Koa speaks some other language.  From that point on, the guy basically tries to keep the kid alive, while the little girl essentially wanders into one dangerous situation after another that he has to help her escape from.  It's here that I started to feel like I was watching two actors impersonate a video game, as the remainder of 65 concerns them trekking across a dangerous landscape, being menaced by giant lizards, and trying to find a usable escape pod so that they can return home.  The movie is literally that simple, and with no real opportunities to build a connection with these two characters, I started staring at the clock periodically.  

I think a lot has to do with the casting.  Adam Driver is one of our great actors, but he is completely wrong to play a gun-toting hero who is this kid's only chance at survival.  You need a grizzled actor for this role, or a charming rogue.  Driver is much too soft-spoken, and never seems the slightest bit interested..  Even when he's supposed to be fretting that he may never see his family again, or trying to grapple with how to tell this girl that they are truly alone, he never convinces.  Young Ariana Greenblat might go on to great things one day, but I can't tell, as here she's basically required to scream and wander blindly into sequences that set up the next action beat.  She's essentially like one of those video game characters with horrible AI that the player is expected to guard in order to complete the level.


Yes, the effects are well done, and at only 93 minutes, the movie at least doesn't feel bloated.  But there's just simply nothing here.  And why did we need another blockbuster that refuses to acknowledge the awe and wonder of dinosaurs, and simply uses them for cheap thrills?  Even the B-Movies of old that this so closely resembles knew how to have fun with themselves.  65 is deadly serious, and deadly dull.


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